


A Rush of Blood to the Head

by audreyii_fic



Series: The Sparrowkeet Series [10]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Angst, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-17
Updated: 2013-06-17
Packaged: 2017-12-15 07:10:36
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/846756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/audreyii_fic/pseuds/audreyii_fic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zuko can't figure out how to earn Katara's forgiveness. A rewrite of <i>The Southern Raiders</i>. Sparrowkeet!verse; guest-written by <b>Like A Dove</b>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Rush of Blood to the Head

**Author's Note:**

> Pre-A/N: This one - based on The Southern Raiders - takes place not long after Observations From a Rock Ledge (Chapter 7) and awhile before Of Edged Weapons and Eavesdropping (Chapter 4).
> 
> Like A Dove rocks.
> 
> A/N: Hi, Like A Dove here.
> 
> A couple of weeks ago audreyii_fic asked me to write another Zuko bit for her Sparrowkeet Series which I jumped on because, um, this story is awesome and I would have been stupid to refuse.
> 
> I suppose you could say that the delay for this update is all my fault HA.
> 
> Special thanks to audreyii_fic for letting me write for her story, and to Coldplay, who I pre-gamed with an embarrassing amount of times before writing this sucker.
> 
> Hope everyone enjoys (I think audreyii_fic likes it)! Also, the first bit in italics is written by audreyii_fic :D

_**A Rush of Blood to the Head  
** (written by Like A Dove)_

* * *

_I'm going to buy this place and start a fire_   
_Stand here until I fill all your heart's desires_   
_Because I'm going to buy this place and see it burn_   
_Do back the things it did to you in return._

_A Rush of Blood to the Head, Coldplay_

* * *

> A huge map papered the stone floor, depicting each of the four nations in stunning precision. Every harbor, every mountain, every tiny hamlet was etched out in perfect detail, rendering the mysteries of the world into shades of ink.
> 
> Sokka was clearly in love. It had actually taken several minutes before he was able to stop his infatuated staring to speak, but then he was all business. "So here," he said, drawing the tip of his finger from the Black Cliffs to Chameleon Bay, "is where the air ships will be attacking."
> 
> "Right," said Zuko. "They'll wait to the south, by Whale Tail Island, then set out to arrive at the mouth of the bay by the time Sozin's Comet arrives."
> 
> "To cut off any escaping armies."
> 
> "And citizens. They'll bomb every ship that tries to pass. It won't matter who's on them."
> 
> Most of the others were by the other fire, chatting over their dinners, but Katara sat close and ate her stew silently.
> 
> "Okay." Sokka touched the western edge of the Earth Kingdom. "And the navy's going to land here?"
> 
> "No, here." Zuko pointed just to the north of where Sokka had indicated. "To block the river. Then the foot soldiers will disembark and march on Omashu."
> 
> "All Firebenders?"
> 
> "The advance troops will be. The non-Firebenders will come in from the south to clean up. After the cities are destroyed, the standing armies in the colonies will sweep around from the north. It's all coordinated. After that it's just a matter of taking the desert and Gaoling."
> 
> "And where do we need to send Aang? Where will Ozai be?"
> 
> "He'll travel with the air fleet to Chameleon Bay, then head north to Ba Sing Se on his own. He's planning to burn it down by himself."
> 
> "Can he?"
> 
> "With the power of the Comet? I don't know. Maybe. Probably."
> 
> Sokka let out a low whistle and shook his head. "Wow. I've gotta say, it's a good plan. It's a really good plan."
> 
> A small, pleased smile crossed Zuko's face. "Thanks."
> 
> There was a moment of silence... then Sokka looked up. "Wait, this was your idea?" he said, stunned.
> 
> "No!" A flush rose to Zuko's good cheek as he amended, "Kind of. I mean, yes... well, parts of it. Not the parts where people get killed."
> 
> Sokka blinked. "You... planned a war where people don't get killed?"
> 
> "Not the citizens! I wanted to evacuate the cities first!"
> 
> "But it was your idea to burn Omashu and Ba Sing Se?"
> 
> Zuko rubbed his forehead. The fires in the Temple seemed to flicker. "Yes. If the people didn't have anywhere to hide, they would need the Fire Nation's help to rebuild. And then... I thought they'd get used to us. Eventually. And we wouldn't seem so bad after awhile."
> 
> "Wouldn't seem so bad after awhile?" Katara said, her voice low and dangerous as she stood up.
> 
> Zuko quailed under her furious expression. "It was a terrible idea," he said quickly. "I see that now."
> 
> Sokka frowned at the map thoughtfully. "You know, it would probably work. If the Earth Kingdom people were scattered and disorganized they'd really have no choice but to accept the Fire Nation-"
> 
> _"They would never accept the Fire Nation!"_
> 
> Everyone turned to look as Katara's shriek echoed through the hall.
> 
> "I'm sorry," Zuko whispered, climbing unsteadily to his feet. "I'm sorry. I wanted to end the war as fast as I could. I wanted us all to be on the same side."
> 
> "The same side?"
> 
> "I know, I'm sorry, I just thought-"
> 
> "You just thought what? That the Earth Kingdom wouldn't mind having their cities burned down? You thought they'd love the Fire Nation if you took everything away from them?"
> 
> "I was wrong! I know I was wrong - I figured that out - Katara, that's why I left!"
> 
> "Shut up!" The angry tears running down Katara's cheeks nearly dripped onto the map; Sokka threw himself forward to catch them before they blurred the outline of the Northern Air Temple. "I don't want to hear it!"
> 
> Zuko reached out, his face stricken. "Katara-"
> 
> "Don't!" She backed up instantly, dodging his hand. "Don't touch me! Don't look at me!" And she ran for the dorms.
> 
> Zuko stared after her, then glanced at the wide-eyed spectators before quickly walking off in the opposite direction.
> 
> The others turned to Sokka. He shrugged. "I guess she took it personally," he said.

* * *

Zuko's side hurts. A lot.

It hurts like hell, actually.

He pulls off his shirt and lays it off to the side before gingerly unraveling the white linen cloth around his torso. The gash and the bruise surrounding it stretches across the left side of his ribs, sensitive to the touch, and red, blue and purple. It looks like it's in the process of healing nicely—at least, it looks better than it did a couple of days ago. But it'll probably scar.

No matter. Zuko is used to having scars by now.

He applies an ointment, wincing slightly, before slowly laying back against his pillow in order to let the wound breathe a bit.

Zuko had thought that his focus had been getting better.

But it's hard to focus when a large amount of rocks are crashing straight at the person you're in love with, right when the person you're in love with happens to be distracted from trying to protect the Avatar.

Zuko has never really considered himself a martyr, but then he always finds himself doing unexpected things when it came to Katara.

Like throwing himself at Katara in order to protect her from a falling ceiling.

Zuko still wasn't sure what the worst part was. It was either the gash in his side from a rock hitting him, or the disappointed look on his sister's face when she noticed that rocks hadn't crushed Katara.

A few hours later, after Azula's attack on the temple, after Zuko had fought his sister and had practically fallen to his death, after half of them escaped on Appa and the other half on the war balloon, after they had made it to an inconspicuous spot off the coast, Katara would look him in the eye and say, "Thank you," very briskly. It was the first time she'd speak to him in almost two weeks.

Zuko readjusts the position of his head on his pillow, hoping that Sokka doesn't come bustling in any time soon. He'd like some time to himself. Just to think, really.

Shadows move across the side of the tent. One he recognizes immediately; it's _her_ of course. The other is shorter and much snarkier. Must be Toph.

Toph deliberately stops right at the corner of his tent before pulling Katara further into their conversation.

He doesn't really know what they're talking about. He just closes his eyes and listens to Katara's voice.

* * *

It's dinnertime. Zuko sits down near the fire along with everyone else and patiently waits for Katara to bring them their meals.

She sets bowls gingerly down in front of Sokka, Suki and Aang. But when she reaches Zuko she practically throws his bowl onto the ground by his feet. Some stew slops out and splatters along his boots.

"Oops," she says, voice nonchalant as she places Toph's bowl down in front of her.

Zuko manages not to react. He picks up his bowl, ignores the snort from Toph, and quietly spoons some stew into his mouth.

And nearly spits it all back out.

It's salty. _Very_ salty.

He subtly glances around at everyone else. Sokka is wolfing his down, no surprise, but Suki and Toph seem to be eating their's calmly.

Zuko knows that if their stew was even half as salty as his was then Toph would have something to say about it.

He lets out a quiet sigh before he eats another spoonful, barely letting it linger on his tongue before he swallows.

He suppresses a wince.

There's a soft tut from his right. He takes a breath and turns his head. Katara is giving a worried look. It's clearly fake.

"Something wrong with your stew, Zuko?" she asks innocently.

"Not at all," he replies coolly. He takes a large spoonful to illustrate his point.

"Well," Katara continues, unfazed, "if there _is_ something wrong with it then you should just keep eating it."

"Is that so?"

"Definitely. After a while you'll just learn to love it, after all."

Zuko freezes. He should have expected that. He really should have.

Her animosity hurts him now as much as it did a week ago.

He almost says her name. Almost. But another apology would have followed her name and right now she won't _listen_ to apologies.

He needs to figure out a way to _apologize_ without actually saying he's sorry. That's the only way she'll _listen_ , he thinks.

He sets his bowl down. He wasn't really hungry to begin with.

* * *

Before Zuko can even awkwardly knock on the side of Toph's self-made rock tent, all four sides slam back down into the earth.

And there's Toph, standing in the middle of her space and calmly picking at her fingernails.

"Sparky."

Zuko sighs. "I need to talk to Sokka."

The earthbender freezes in her fingernail picking, briefly thrown off. Then she shoots a spot around Zuko's shoulder a pointed look. "Now I realize that I _am_ blind, but I'm pretty sure that Sokka and I don't really look anything alike—"

"Toph, I need to _talk_ to Sokka."

And then Toph understands. Realization lights up her face and she suddenly smirks. "It'll cost you."

Zuko came prepared. "I'll let you call me 'Sparky' all the time and I won't complain about it."

Toph rolls her eyes. "I already call you 'Sparky', Sparky, and if anything your complaining amuses me. Next offer."

"I'll let you throw rocks at me whenever you want."

Toph ponders that for a moment. "Tempting, but no. I can throw rocks at you anyway."

Zuko is starting to lose his patience. He takes a deep breath and releases it slowly in attempt not to shout.

" _Okay._ How about you pick a day and I'll… let you ride on my back."

Toph grins. "All day long?"

Zuko resists a groan. "All day long."

The earthbender shoves a fist into the air. "Alright, Sparky! Now we're talking." She turns around and begins to rummage through her small amount of possessions before standing back up and holding out a small, drawstring bag.

"Cinnamon drops," she explains. "You offer Sokka a couple of these bad boys and he'll tell you whatever you need to know."

Zuko takes the back and shoots her a grateful look before remembering that she can't see it.

"Thank you," he says. And then, after a beat, "Sometimes I think you're too devious for your own good."

Toph shrugs, looking perfectly at ease. "One of us in this group has to be."

* * *

Zuko has noticed that in the past couple of weeks Sokka has started to be much more tolerant of him. Zuko suspects it might be because Katara's rage against him hasn't gone unnoticed and Sokka pities him. Or it could be the fancy maps.

Probably the fancy maps.

Either way, sharing a tent with Sokka isn't really so bad. Sokka likes him enough to talk about war strategies and geek out over swords with him.

But that doesn't mean that Sokka _trusts_ Zuko.

Which is why Zuko is walking into this battle armed.

"I want to talk to you about your sister."

Sokka, who had been inspecting his space sword for any speck of dust, stills and looks up at him cautiously. "Oh?"

Zuko shifts a little bit from his spot in their tent, slightly uncomfortable. "I was hoping you could help me."

Sokka blinks and sets his sword off to his side. "Well that's nice. I'm not gonna lie, an overwhelming wave of exhaustion has washed over me and I don't think I'm up for any deep conver—Are those cinnamon drops?"

Zuko is spreading the candy Toph gave him out in front of his lap. "I don't know, are they?"

Sokka stares at the drops, eyes wide and mouth slightly agape. He pulls his hands up to his chest, obviously conflicted. "It's been so long since I've tasted the deliciousness of cinnamon drops…"

Zuko pops one into his mouth and makes loud crunching noises. Sokka whimpers.

Zuko only eats one more before Sokka gives in. "Okay, okay! Just—stop eating them and let me have one!" He waves his arms around dramatically before finally grabbing one and shoving it into his mouth. He makes a loud moaning noise and a goofy expression crosses over his face.

Zuko hopes that he never ever grows this attached to food.

He clears his throat and begins to gather the rest of the drops into his hands. "I'll just enjoy the rest of these." But then his eyes slowly shift back towards Sokka. "Unless, of course, you want more?"

From the look that comes to Sokka's face he knows he's been cornered. He shakes his head slowly before huffing, eyes on the drops the entire time. "What do you need to know?" he says dully.

Zuko, repressing smugness, pulls Katara's necklace out of his pocket and lays it across his blanket.

"Why is this important to Katara?"

* * *

He's tired. He doesn't feel too good. The rock he's been sitting on all night is uncomfortable and he knows he looks like shit.

But when Katara steps out from her tent and starts to comb her hair he thinks that it's going to be worth it. That it _is_ worth it.

She spots him and freezes. Then, "You look terrible." She turns to walk away.

"I've been out here all night," he says softly. The morning sun catches her hair and face, and it's all so lovely that he doesn't even care that she's scowling at him.

Katara rolls her blue eyes and starts combing her hair again. But she doesn't walk away. "What do you want?"

He opens up his palm and lets the ribbon of her necklace slip between his fingers. He catches the ribbon right at the end so that the necklace dangles from his fingertips.

"You had me keep this," he states.

Katara's eyes widen slightly and then she flushes.

"I'm not exactly sure what me keeping this means," his continues, gaze sliding toward the ground, slightly awkward. "But I know what it meant to you before…"

He glances back up to see her eyebrows furrow in confusion, a frown on her face.

Before she can open her mouth to speak he says, "I know who killed your mother and I'm going to help you find him."

She drops the comb.

* * *

Appa is saddled, Zuko's bag is packed, Katara is in the middle of gathering her things and the sun is beating down on the back of Zuko's neck.

He's ready to go. He shifts his weight between his feet before grabbing a handful of hay. He's feeding Appa when the Avatar storms up, Sokka right behind him.

There's a whoosh of air and suddenly Zuko is flat on his back.

"You and Katara were just going to take Appa and leave without telling us?"

Zuko should have known that they wouldn't be able to leave without the Avatar throwing a hissy fit. He sits up, fingers clenching into the dirt for a moment before he stands, a small spark escaping from between his lips.

Interestingly enough the Savior of the World happens to be one of Zuko's least favorite people.

Katara straightens up, slinging her bag over her shoulder, before leveling her gaze on the Avatar. "Yes. _I_ was."

The Avatar frowns before shooting a furious look at Zuko. "But he's—"

"We're going to find the man who killed my mother." Zuko can hear the quivering rage in Katara's voice and apparently Sokka can as well. The water tribe boy takes a step forward, casting doubtful glances between his sister and Zuko. He doesn't say anything, oddly enough.

The Avatar opens his mouth again but Zuko cuts him off. "Sokka told me what happened with Katara's mother. I know who killed her and I know where we can find him."

The Avatar's eyes narrow. "I don't see what that's going to accomplish," he says, clearly frustrated.

Katara shakes her head before handing Zuko her bag. He tosses it up onto Appa's back with ease. "I knew you wouldn't understand," she says flatly.

The Avatar's face falls and he quickly moves forward, stepping between Katara and the bison. "No, Katara! I do understand! You're feeling unbelievable pain and rage. How do you think I felt about the sandbenders when they stole Appa? How do you think—"

"Did you really just compare you having your pet stolen to Katara having her mother _murdered?_ " Zuko says pointedly. He feels anger begin to burn in his chest.

The Avatar is such a _child._

Panic is written clearly on the Avatar's face. He turns to Katara, eyes wide, but she merely steps around him.

"I need this, Aang," she says quietly. "This is about getting closure and justice."

The Avatar's face hardens somewhat and he casts a hateful look in Zuko's direction as if this is all _his_ fault. "I don't think so. I think this is about getting revenge."

Katara snaps. " _Fine!_ Maybe it _is_ about getting revenge! Maybe revenge is what I _need._ But it will be nothing less than this man deserves." Her chest is heaving and Zuko can see that's she's shaking. He resists the urge to dart in front of Katara and block the Avatar's view of her. But he makes himself stay put.

"Katara," the Avatar says softly, "you sound like Jet."

Zuko's hands curl into fists.

The Avatar is asking for it.

He is fucking _asking for it._

_Fucking Jet._

Katara grits her teeth in anger. "That was different! Jet attacked the innocent, but this man, this man is a _monster_." Her voice is ice cold.

Sokka finally speaks up. "Katara, she was my mother too, but I don't think this is such a good idea…"

Katara whirls toward her brother. "Stay out of this!"

Sokka doesn't say anything, nor does he take a step back. He glances at Zuko and the two exchange a look. Zuko understands what it means.

_Bring her back._

The Avatar speaks up again. "The monks used to say that revenge is like a two-headed rat-viper. While you watch your enemy go down, you're being poisoned yourself."

"That's cute." Zuko throws his bag up onto Appa. "It must be nice, not living in reality."

The Avatar narrows his eyes at him but Zuko ignores it. He's growing fed up with the preaching.

Katara places a hand on Appa's saddle before turning back to the Avatar. "Aang, now that I know he's out there, now that I know I can face him, I don't have a choice. I _have_ to find him."

The Avatar shakes his head. "Katara, you _do_ have a choice. Forgiveness."

It's Zuko's turn to snap. "You're one to talk about forgiveness." The Avatar hasn't exactly forgiven _him_ yet, either. "So spare us the hypocrisy, all right?"

As he says the words, Zuko half expects Katara to give him a disapproving look. He _is_ yelling at the Avatar, after all.

But he's surprised to see her glaring at the Avatar, not at him.

That might be a first.

He turns to Katara and gently places a hand on her shoulder. "Come on."

As they climb aboard Appa Zuko catches a glimpse of the Avatar's face. He looks shell-shocked and slightly guilty.

Then Sokka cups his hands around his mouth and shouts, "You better have her back in four days! Any later and I will find you and disembowel you and I will _enjoy it!_ "

"Fair enough," Zuko calls back, settling in the saddle. Katara sits on Appa's head, grabs the reins and calls _yip yip_.

They're off.

* * *

It's times like these that Zuko wishes he hadn't given Haru his war balloon.

War balloons don't shed, nor do they drop their _business_ like bombs from the sky.

Zuko pities whoever is below them.

He shifts a bit in the saddle. He's tired (sleeping on a giant flying animal isn't very easy), and the tip of his nose and his cheeks are red from the whipping wind.

Even still, he crawls towards Appa's head.

"How are you—"

"We're almost there," she interrupts, not even bothering to turn her head back in his direction.

He frowns, but says nothing. They've already gone over what they're going to do when they arrive at the Fire Navy tower, and apologizing for the umpteenth time won't get him anywhere.

He scoots a little closer to Appa's head before pulling his legs up to his chest. He'll just have to wait.

Actions speak louder than words anyway.

* * *

As Zuko sprints at a dead run towards Appa with Katara right on his heels, he can feel dawn coming.

Adrenaline pumps through his system. He suspects that at any moment he'll hear shouting, or see fire blasting in their direction, but there is nothing. They got in and out of the tower as quietly as thieves.

"I'll steer Appa," he says, voice shallow like his breathing. But Katara bolts in front of him, grabs hold of Appa's saddle and hoists herself up and in one graceful move.

"I've got it," she exclaims, landing on the top of Appa's head and grabbing his reins. The bison lets out a deep rumble as Zuko heaves himself up onto the bison's back with a thud. His muscles ache and his heart is pounding in his chest.

"You were steering all yesterday—"

"I said I got it." She turns her head and looks at him briefly. There's a slight tilt to her mouth and her eyes gleam with feral determination that he's never seen in her before.

In the back of his mind he's somewhat reminded of his sister.

There's a lifting sensation and the ground starts to drift further and further away as they rise. Zuko thinks that maybe he should feel wary or apprehensive of what's coming.

But he doesn't.

* * *

He had fallen asleep, which has been unplanned, and when he wakes up he sees her still steering Appa with the reins clinched tightly in her hands. Her knuckles are nearly white.

"You should let me drive and get some rest," he says softly. "We'll be there soon."

She straightens her shoulders and her spine stiffens in stubbornness. "Don't you worry about my strength." Her voice is strained.

He doesn't have to see her face to know that there are dark circles under her blue eyes.

There's a sharp intake of breath. "I'm not helpless anymore. Not this time."

Zuko frowns, but leans against the side of Appa's saddle in silence. He watches her back and picks at a lose thread in his black pants. He doesn't expect her to say anything else.

But she does. She starts to tell him about what happened to her mother.

The sadness in her voice weaves around him and constricts him because he knows. He _knows._

For a moment he can almost feel the downy feathers of baby turtle ducks against his fingertips.

He watches Katara's head start to tilt down, sees her fingers brush against her throat where her mother's necklace normally sits.

She stops speaking.

"Your mother was a brave woman," he finally says.

"I know," she answers.

Zuko likes to think that perhaps his mother was too.

* * *

Being completely underwater with only an air bubble surrounding Appa's head is somewhat terrifying for Zuko. The fact that Katara is a master waterbender doesn't make him feel much better either.

He's not one hundred percent sure she wouldn't let him drown.

Then he sees a couple of soldiers sinking into the water from above them because of Katara's water whips and then Appa is diving under the ship in order to get to the other side.

Zuko twists his shaking fingers into Appa's fur.

Then they're out of the water and huge waves crash onto the deck, sending soldiers swimming overboard.

Appa lands on the deck and Zuko and Katara are off, feet pounding against metal. A lone soldier who managed to cling to the deck sends fire at them and before Zuko can bend to counteract it a tunnel of water cuts of the attack.

He glances over at Katara. There are tears in her eyes.

Then they're rushing down stairs into the lower decks, flying down corridors and looking for the correct door.

A door to a storage room opens up and a soldier brandishing a sword charges out of it toward them.

Zuko darts forward, grabs and twists the soldiers arm and throws him back into the storage room. Then he slams the door shut and slides the sword into the door handles.

He turns to Katara and they continue on until they find the correct door.

She stops in front of it, arms coated in water and chest heaving with emotion and adrenaline. Zuko stops beside her, shoulder to shoulder. "Katara, are you ready for this?"

There's a slight moment of hesitation and then she lets out a scream of rage before sending a rush of water at the door. It bursts open, revealing the captain.

There's a wave of fire but Zuko catches it and disperses it.

"Who are you?" the captain asks, staggering backward a couple of steps. He glares at both of them.

"You don't remember her?" Zuko takes on a fighting stance, a cold feeling freezing in the pit of this stomach. "You will."

He shoves his fist forward and sends a stream of fire at the captain who blocks it. The captain moves into a bending stance.

But then he stills. The captain's arms twist at an unnatural angle and Zuko hears a bone snap. There's a groan of pain as the man's knees begin to wobble.

"What's…what's _happening?_ " he gasps, finally falling onto his knees. His body twists some more and then he's bent over, head almost touching the floor. His helmet slips off. "What's happening to me?"

With wide eyes Zuko turns his gaze towards Katara. She's in a strange bending stance, one he's never seen before, with her arms out and her fingers curling in the air. There's an unnaturally satisfied smile on her face.

Somewhat sickened, Zuko realizes exactly what she's doing. He feels the blood drain from his face.

For a moment Zuko isn't sure what to do. This is wrong. There is no _honor_ in this.

But then he remembers _his_ Katara crying in a cave over the mother she never got to know. Over the mother that this man took away from her.

The cold feeling spreads from his stomach to his chest.

He turns his head back towards the captain and narrows his eyes. "Think back," he says, voice steely. "Think back to your last raid on the Southern Water Tribe."

The captain is huddled on the floor. "I don't know!" His ankle starts to turn in the wrong direction. " _Please!_ I don't know!"

The cold feeling spreads from his chest to his heart. Zuko kneels next to the captain's head. "Don't lie! You look her in the eye and tell me you don't remember what you did!" he growls.

The captain lets out a sob of terror as his head is lifted up against his will. Katara stares down at him with a snarl. But then her face softens.

"It's not him." Her hands drop and the captain falls back onto the floor. She turns her head away somberly.

"What do you mean it's not him?" Zuko can feel Katara's forgiveness slipping away like water between his fingers. "He's the leader of the Southern Raiders!"

"It's not him," she repeats dully and walks out of the room.

The cold feeling spreads from his heart to his eyes and Zuko is blinded by anger.

He grabs the captain by the cusp of his neck, yanks him up and shoves him against the wall.

"If you're not the man we're looking for then who is?"

The captain lets out a cry of pain. "Yon Rha! You're looking for Yon Rha! He retired four years ago!"

Satisfied, Zuko lets the captain go. He sinks back down onto the floor.

Out in the corridor Katara is crying. Zuko puts a hand against the small of her back and leads her forward.

* * *

Later, when they're both back in the sky on top of Appa and the cold feeling has melted away, Zuko has to lean over the side of Appa's saddle to throw up three times.

It has nothing to do with motion sickness.

* * *

They find Yon Rha in a lackluster village not too far from where the Southern Raiders had been located.

"It's going to rain," Zuko observes softly, eyes looking up at the graying sky.

Katara's mouth sets in a thin, determined line. "Good."

The first place they hide is in a closed tea shop. Zuko peers out the window, studying the man who they think might be their target.

He ducks low when the suspected Yon Rha turns around and peers in their direction.

"We're going to have to be careful," he whispers. Katara nods stiffly, fingers curling over the window sill. She hasn't looked out of it yet.

The man leaves the marketplace and instead of following behind him Zuko suggests they cut through a gathering of trees along the side of the road and set a trap for him.

They string black thread between two rocks before climbing up an elevated side of the road. They wait, and when the man comes into view Katara leans forward eagerly.

"That's him. That's the monster." Her hands tighten into fists and Zuko places a hand against her knee to keep her from barging forward. She relaxes slightly, eyes never leaving Yon Rha.

Raindrops begin to fall.

Then the man stops. "No one sneaks up on me," he exclaims, whirling around and lighting a bush on fire.

Zuko and Katara quietly get down from their perch.

And then Yon Rha is turning and tripping over the trap they had set up for him. He lands face first into a puddle of mud and before he can stand up Zuko is sending a jet of fire at him. Yon Rha scrambles backwards, startled.

"We weren't behind the bush." The cold feeling returns, but Zuko doesn't care. He moves into a firebending form, and glares down at the coward in front of him.

He _hates_ him. "I wouldn't try firebending again either."

Yon Rha shields his face. "Whoever you are, take my money, take everything! I'm willing to cooperate!"

Katara steps around Zuko, rage etched into her face. "Do you know who I am?"

Yon Rha's eyes widen fearfully. "No," he splutters. "I'm… I'm not sure."

"You better remember me like your life depends on it. _Because it does_." For a moment Zuko could swear that it is Katara who can spit fire, not him. "Take a closer look."

For a moment the man just stares at her. And then he looks somewhat shocked. And nauseous. "Yes, I remember you now. You're the little girl from the Southern Water Tribe. Your mother was the last waterbender."

Zuko feels a twinge of surprise. He glances at Katara.

Something in her has broken; he can see that by the expression on her face. Tears leak out of her eyes and mix in with raindrops on her cheeks.

"She lied to you," she says sadly. "She was protecting the last waterbender."

Yon Rha looks shocked. "Wh-Who?"

Then Katara whirls at him with more pure malice and fury. " _ME!_ "

She starts to bend with an emotion that Zuko has never seen in her before: murderous hatred. Rain water closes around them before she freezes it and separates it into tiny shards of deadly ice. Then she moves her arms in an arc and sends the ice shards flying towards Yon Rha, who does nothing but cower in the mud.

Zuko thinks that it's fitting for cowards with no honor to die in the mud. And he won't even have to deal with the body. He'll just let him rot here in the middle of the road like he deserves.

But then the ice shards stop and hover just inches away from Yon Rha. His eyes are squeezed shut, waiting for impact, but when the impact doesn't come he opens them. Then he clings onto Katara's hesitation.

"I did a bad thing! I know I did and you deserve your revenge! So…so why don't you take my mother? That'd be fair, right?"

Katara's upper lip curls into a snarl. "I always wondered what kind of person could do such a thing, and now I think I understand." The hovering ice shards start to tremble. "There's just nothing inside of you. _Nothing._ You're pathetic and empty."

"Please spare me!" Yon Rha begs.

"I _hate_ you," Katara spits. "So much. But…" The ice shards melt pack into water and pelt the ground. "I just can't do it."

Her upper lip wobbles and Zuko hears Katara sniff as she turns around and walks off.

Zuko sees Yon Rha smiling weakly to himself. Then, without a second thought, Zuko moves forward and kicks Yon Rha hard in the ribs. Then again. And another time.

Then he turns around and follows Katara into the trees.

* * *

Rain falls on their little campsite. Appa is asleep and Katara is huddled against his side, knees pulled up against her chest and face resting on top of them.

She's been crying since they left Yon Rha. Zuko has made sure to give her her space, but right now he needs to make sure she's taken care of.

He walks up to her and sits down beside her. He wordlessly hands her a bit of beef jerky and some soggy bread that had been in his bag. She takes it and chews in silence. Zuko would bet that she probably couldn't even taste it. He watches her swallow.

"Do you think I made the right decision?" she asks. He stills because he hadn't been expecting her to speak.

"What do you mean?"

She looks up at him and catches his gaze. Her eyes are red and she looks so tired. "Do you think I did the right thing? Not killing Yon Rha?"

Zuko props an elbow on his knee and glances down at the jerky in his hand. "I think you did what was best for you."

"I wanted to do it. I wanted to so badly. And part of me wonders if I couldn't kill him because I was strong enough not to or because I was too weak to do what needed to be done."

Her face crumbles and her shoulders shake in silent sobs. Zuko can feel something breaking a little bit inside of him at the sight.

He scoots right up to her, not really caring if she hasn't forgiven him yet, and wraps an arm around her waist, gently pulling her against him. She complies and molds herself against the side of his body, hands fisting into the fabric of his shirt as she cries into his shoulder.

They sit like that for a long time. He slowly traces circles against her hip in an attempt to soothe her.

Finally she pulls away, but keeps her head resting against his shoulder. "What will you do?"

"Hmm?"

"When you face your mother's killer, what will you do?"

Zuko is quiet for a long moment. "I'm not sure," he lies.

After a time her body weight settles against him and then she's asleep. Zuko sits awake for the rest of the night and watches raindrops glisten in the moonlight.

* * *

The next morning Katara asks to look at his side before they load up Appa.

He lifts up his shirt and shows her. Katara gasps. "Sokka had said it looked bad but…"

Zuko shrugs. In all honesty he had forgotten about the pain in his side. Well, he had forgotten about most physical pain for that matter.

She pulls water towards her hands and takes a hesitant step forward, eyes beseeching. "If you want to I can—"

He lets his shirt fall back into place and shakes his head. "That's okay. Thanks anyway, though."

She bites her lips and nods, slightly confused.

Actually, now that Zuko thought about it, his side felt better than it had a few days ago.

Sometimes it's best to let things heal on their own, he thinks.

* * *

His family's old home on Ember Island looks the same as it did ten years ago. Zuko suspects that that's why his chest aches.

After spending a solid twenty minutes assuring Sokka that absolutely no harm had come to a single hair on his sister's head, Zuko walks off to find said sister.

He spots her sitting on the edge of the port talking to the Avatar. Zuko sighs and quietly approaches them.

"I'm proud of you," he overhears the Avatar saying.

He sees Katara shrug, sees her tilt her head back a bit and look at him.

"I'm still not sure if I did the right thing," she says, and Zuko isn't sure if she's talking to him or the Avatar.

"You did the right thing," the Avatar assures her. "Forgiveness is the first step we take in the process of healing."

Katara's face falls and she quickly stands up. "But I didn't forgive him, Aang. I'll _never_ forgive him. That I know for _sure_ is the right thing."

She bites her lip and steps up to Zuko. "But, I think I'm ready to forgive _you_."

Something hot builds in the back of his throat. "I'm _so_ sorry, Katara. You know I don't think like that anymore—"

But before he can say anything else Katara closes the space between them and slips her arms around his neck, her nose brushing against his chin. Zuko returns the embrace and pulls her up against him, the side of his face presses against her hair. He has to resist the urge to bend down and kiss her.

She tilts her head to the side and whispers into his ear, "Thank you." He shudders.

When she pulls back, only keeping one hand on his shoulder, she looks up at him with a gentle smile. There's something in the expression in her eyes and the pull of her lips that makes Zuko feel almost shy.

Then she lets her hand fall away from his shoulder and walks away. Zuko turns around and watches her go, feeling an odd sense of peace.

There's a clearing of a throat behind him. "Zuko, can I, uh, talk to you?"

Zuko sighs and turns back around to face the Avatar. "Sure."

The boy takes a few steps forward and opens and closes his mouth a couple of times. "I… You brought Katara back," he finally states.

"I did."

"And she's okay."

"She is." Zuko frowns.

The Avatar looks unsure. He rubs the back of his bald head and looks at a point over Zuko's shoulder.

Zuko is growing impatient. "Look, Avatar—"

"Thank you," the Avatar blurts out. "Thank you for bringing Katara back."

Zuko almost scoffs but nods anyway. He turns to walk away but the Avatar continues.

"I've thought about what happened the other day. About forgiveness."

Zuko frowns.

The Avatar visibly gulps. "I just wanted to say I'm sorry for being hypocritical."

Zuko lets himself smirk slightly. "You're forgiven."

The Avatar winces. "It's just, I haven't been very nice to you since you've come here, even though you've been teaching me firebending and all. But, it's just I've been so _angry_ with you because of what happened back at Ba Sing Se." The Avatar looks somewhat guilty. "And the thing is I'm _still_ mad at you."

The Avatar looks up at him, eyes filled with clarity. "I don't think I'm ready to forgive you just yet, but… maybe… maybe we can be nicer to each other?" he offers hopefully.

Zuko lifts a shoulder halfheartedly. "Sure, Avatar."

"It's Aang," the Avatar corrects. "It's… my name is Aang."

Zuko blinks. "Sure… Aang."

* * *

The next morning he's unceremoniously woken up with his face being smacked by a pillow.

"Guess what today is?" Toph exclaims in excitement.

Zuko groans.

"Today is the day that you, Sparky, gets to carry me, Toph, around on your back _all day!_ "

Somewhere outside of his room Zuko can hear Katara laughing.


End file.
